What's wrong with That?

by John A. Younts

What's wrong with that? Put another way, you might hear, "I can't see any harm in doing ______ . After all, I did that." These questions are asked because families today live a whirlwind lifestyle in which pressures and problems and decisions must be answered on the run. Somebody wants something done every time one turns around. It often seems necessary to make decisions quickly, without taking time to consider fully the matter at hand.

Under this sort of pressure, the questions above become the basis for decisions. Parents rightly look to see if there is anything harmful in the proposed course of action. Is this bad for my children? Are there bad influences? Is it dangerous? Has someone else I know done this? Will my kids enjoy it? Oh, why not? It seems like fun.

However, another question must be asked. The other question that should be asked is What is right with _______?

What makes this activity right and pleasing to God? is a much harder question to answer on the run. God, however, wants you to think about it.

As a Christian, whatever you do either adds to your Father's reputation or detracts from it. This is what is meant by giving glory to God -- your godly speech and actions add to His reputation. (For an excellent discussion of this point, see Jay Adams' Back to the Blackboard, pp. 22-24) What you do or plan to do with your children affects God's reputation. So, the decisions you make deserve careful attention.

Thankfully, God gives us specific how-to instructions in the Bible, for just this task. Let's look at a few:

(Rom 12:17) Don't return evil for evil to anyone; plan ahead to do what is fine in the eyes of everybody.

(Col 3:16-17) Let Christ's Word dwell in you richly, as you teach and counsel yourselves with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs with grace in your hearts toward God.
17 And whatever you do by word or deed, do everything in the Name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him.

(Col 1:9-10) And so, from the day that we heard about it, we haven't stopped praying for you and asking that you may be filled with the full knowledge of His will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding 10 to walk in a way that is worthy of the Lord, pleasing Him in everything, bearing the fruit of every sort of good work and growing in the full knowledge of God. (CCNT)

These verses speak to every decision that you make. Look at the phrases "whatever you do," "pleasing Him in everything. . . every sort of good work. . . ." They leave no areas of your life untouched. Thinking carefully about pleasing God is not optional. It is not to be reserved for a convenient time. God wants you to be concerned every day about how your actions give thanks to Him.

So, use these (and other) instructions to guide you in making decisions. Will this activity cause my child to "please Him in all respects?" Will this teach and encourage him to "bear fruit in every good work?" Will the people involved in this activity influence my child to love God more? Will some aspect of my child's walk with God be deepened by this activity? Is this activity an opportunity to show thankfulness to God? Does it seem out of place to do this activity in the Name of the Lord Jesus?

Asking Is it right? is not the same thing as asking Will God be mad at me? Asking whether something is right, biblically, is asking whether it pleases God. Is it something that can be done in gratitude to Him? Asking Is it right? is not a question of burden, but a question of love.

When you shop for Christmas, do you try to select gifts in order to avoid offending your loved ones? Of course not. You "plan ahead" to please them -- because you love them. That's the way you should relate to your Heavenly Father. You love Him, and your heart overflows with love and gratitude. You can never do enough to show your thankfulness!

This relationship of love colors our understanding of all Scripture. Examine Proverbs 5:21: For a man's ways are in full view of the LORD, and he examines all his paths. In one sense, it is appropriate to look at this verse as one of warning and fear. However, it is even more appropriate to realize that you are always in view of the One who sent His Son to die in your place. You are in constant view of the One who has lavished His riches upon you (Eph. 1). You are always in view of the One to whom you owe everything good in your life. You are always in view of the One who gives you your next breath.

Why do you think God gives you your next breath? Why does God give your child his next breath? The answer for the Christian is: so that the Name of God may be honored on the earth. God wants you and your child to walk in a manner that pleases Him because you love Him.

These thoughts should dominate your mind as you think of Proverbs 5:21.

What is wrong with ________? This is an important question. Even more important is What is right with _______? God wants you to plan to honor Him. God wants you to consider how you and your children will please Him in every deed that you do.

Parents must stand back from the daily pressures of life to ask what is right before God. The question ought not to be one of burden, but of joy! You have the unspeakable privilege of obeying God and causing His name to be honored in the earth.

In Ephesians 6:1, Paul directs your children to obey you in the Lord. This is indeed a high calling. What is wrong with ______? can usually be best answered by asking What is right with ______? Asking what is right will help you to focus on the positive aspects of your job as a parent. Do not decide issues on the basis of what is wrong. Decide issues on the basis of what is right before your loving, gracious heavenly Father. Your children will grasp the difference as you lead them in ways of truth. Only asking What is wrong with _____? will lead to conformity. Asking What is right with ______? will transform your lives, as you and your children renew your minds in the service of Christ.